Bitch at work

I realized, sometimes I can become a bit bitchy to some people. When my PMS coming, I'm not in mood, I don't like to see some faces without a reason or maybe, without a reason, I feel don't like you.

Yesterday morning, I play bitch to Wendy. I feel a bit irritating when arriving to my cubic and found out she's there. I can understand she want to comp-edit but the part irritating me is, she haven't settle down herself to do work. With her hand bag around my desk, can see that she straight away come to my place to do comp-edit. Can u just settle down urself first before start working, put ur handbag at ur desk, switch on ur computer, check ur email to makesure u coop with latest amend/news client or editor, go take a cup of coffee/drinks then only come to my workspace. I hate people do work without arrangement/schedule/plan. It irritating me when she make mistake.

And she did make mistake. Thats was a part where she heard my lecture. I won't lecture her on her working attitude, it her style. But I lecture her on my working file. When she do comp-edit, she didn't use common sense at all. It's not like she don't have brain. But she like to do work rushing, and later end up with mistake.

After that she retreat from my cubical, asked Saras to continue the comp-edit. For me, what ever, as long the work done correctly, I don't care. If it about work, don't care u want merajuk or what. I'm not a friends when I do work.

Stress till the limit

Aku kinda sangat stress lately dekat ofis. Keje sentiasa bertambun. Yang lagi menyakitkan ati, derang x pernah tanya aku busy ke x, atau bila aku leh kasi derang. Derang cuma campak2 atas tray ni, hopefully aku leh bagi kat derang paling lambat 2-3 jam giler. Aku orang yang bekerja sebagai designer oK???? Bukan mesin cetak gambar yang input/tekan/preview dan print.

Semalam si Vinod simply2 call aku n bagi aku instruction. Serius, darah aku cam nk tersembur dah melalui otak yang mendidih. Sangat tension dan marah ok??? Ko x paham2 ke aku dah banyak keje? Arghhhhhhhhhh stress, aku dah la designer gaji paling ciput kat sini, paling low-level tapi paling banyak mende beratur atas tray (ni aku assume).

Pastu pagi ni si pram majuk plak dah. Huhuhuhu... ada makna ke majuk ngan aku? Kalo aku leh wat, aku dah buat, reti x dateline production aku dah tunda 3 hari psal IMS project, ada faham x?

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh .... stress tahap gaban.

Ni seme Shah nya psal. Kalo x kerana gaji dia yg ciput. Aku x sengsara camni. Kang best bila tension camni, aku leh masuk bilik bos campak surat benti. I'M QUIT!

Hahaha... nasib aku bukan anak org kaya. Banyak tanggungjawab plak tu.

8 ways to drive a graphic designer mad!

I get this fwd mail from Rowena, Now I know, there is agenda in client mind.

Everyone knows, graphic designers are the reason there are so many wars in this world. They get inside our heads with their subliminal advertising, force us against our will to spend money on the worst pieces of shit, and eventually, drive us to depression and random acts of violence. And of course, most of them are communists.

So to do my part to save the world from them, i made a list of things you can do when working with a graphic designer, to assure that they have a burn-out and leave this business FOREVER.


1-Microsoft Office
When you have to send a graphic designer a document, make sure it's made with a program from Microsoft Office. PC version if possible. If you have to send pictures, you'll have more success in driving them mad if, instead of just sending a jpeg or a raw camera file, you embed the pictures inside a Microsoft Office document like Word or Powerpoint. Don't forget to lower the resolution to 72 dpi so that they'll have to contact you again for a higher quality version. When you send them the "higher" version, make sure the size is at least 50% smaller. And if you're using email to send the pictures, forget the attachment once in a while.

2-Fonts
If the graphic designer chooses Helvetica for a font, ask for Arial. If he chooses Arial, ask for Comic Sans. If he chooses Comic Sans, he's already half-insane, so your job's half done.

3-More is better
Let's say you want a newsletter designed. Graphic designers will always try to leave white space everywhere. Large margins, the leading and kerning of text, etc. They will tell you that they do this because it's easier to read, and leads to a more clean, professional look. But do not believe those lies. The reason they do this is to make the document bigger, with more pages, so that it costs you more at the print shop. Why do they do it? Because graphic designers hate you. They also eat babies. Uncooked, raw baby meat.

So make sure you ask them to put smaller margins and really, really small text. Many different fonts are also suggested (bonus if you ask for Comic Sans, Arial or Sand). Ask for clipart. Ask for many pictures (if you don't know how to send them, refer to #1). They will try to argue, and defend their choices but don't worry, in the end the client is always right and they will bow to your many requests.

4-Logos
If you have to send a graphic designer a logo for a particular project, let's say of a sponsor or partner, be sure to have it really really small and in a low-res gif or jpeg format. Again, bonus points if you insert it in a Word document before sending it. Now you might think that would be enough but if you really want to be successful in lowering the mental stability of a graphic designer, do your best to send a version of the logo over a hard to cut-out background. Black or white backgrounds should be avoided, as they are easy to cut-out with the darken or lighten layer style in photoshop. Once the graphic designer is done working on that bitmap logo, tell him you need it to be bigger.

If you need a custom made logo, make your own sketches on a napkin. Or better yet, make your 9 year old kid draw it. Your sketch shouldn't take more than 5 minutes to make. You don't want to make something that's detailed and easy to understand, because the less the designer understands what you want, the more you can make him change things afterwards. Never accept the first logo. Never accept the 9th, make him do many changes, colors, fonts & clip art. Ask him to add a picture in the logo. Bevels. Gradients. Comic Sans. And when he's at his 10th attempt, tell him that you like the 2nd one the most. I know, it's mean but remember: graphic designers are the cause of breast cancer among middle aged women.

5-Chosing your words
When describing what you want in a design, make sure to use terms that don't really mean anything. Terms like "jazz it up a bit" or "can you make it more webbish?". "I would like the design to be beautiful" or "I prefer nice graphics, graphics that, you know, when you look at them you go: Those are nice graphics." are other options. Don't feel bad about it, you've got the right. In fact, it's your duty because we all know that on fullmoons, graphic designers shapeshift into werewolves.

6-Colors
The best way for you to pick colors (because you don't want to let the graphic designer choose) is to write random colors on pieces of paper, put them in a hat and choose. The graphic designer will suggest to stay with 2-3 main colors at the most, but no. Choose as many as you like, and make sure to do the hat thing in front of him. While doing it, sing a very annoying song.

7-Deadlines
When it's your turn to approve the design, take your time. There is no rush. Take two days. Take six. Just as long as when the deadline of the project approaches, you get back to the designer with more corrections and changes that he has time to make. After all, graphic designers are responsible for the 911 attacks.

8-Finish him
After you've applied this list on your victim, it is part of human nature (although some would argue weather they're human or not) to get a bit insecure. As he realises that he just can't satisfy your needs, the graphic designer will most likely abandon all hopes of winning an argument and will just do whatever you tell him to do, without question. You want that in purple? Purple it is. Six different fonts? Sure!

You would think that at this point you have won, but don't forget the goal of this: he has to quit this business. So be ready for the final blow: When making final decisions on colors, shapes, fonts, etc, tell him that you are disappointed by his lack of initiative. Tell him that after all, he is the designer and that he should be the one to put his expertise and talent at work, not you. That you were expecting more output and advices about design from him.

Tell him you've had enough with his lack of creativity and that you would rather do your own layouts on Publisher instead of paying for his services. And there you go. You should have graphic designer all tucked into a straight jacket in no time!


Full page: http://groy82.blogspot.com/2007/03/8-ways-to-drive-graphic-designer-mad.html

Solve a way, SOlvay

I got problem with clients ads since last few days. But the thing made me more headache and anger was because both clients didn't want to admit their ads got problem. THey thought like I have nothing to do like simply reject their artwork or change their ads.

The problems actually is not the client. I understand their situation. Every time they do changes to their ads, they need to pay. Although it might happened cause the agency they choose did not understand perfectly the requirement we need. And then this agency PR is really damn good on 'putar alam'. They know how to answer and put back the blame either to client or to us.

From the agency side, the problem keep pop up cause
1) hire not enough experience people to become their art director
2) want to cut budget, hire a fresh grad to become designer
3) hire not a graphic designer or somebody from publishing/advertising line
4) hire a multimedia designer to cum as graphic designer
5) simply think they good enough to open their own agency, without experience but with money, accomplish goal syok sendiri <--- i hate this reason

Please, the agency out there. Either train ur staff to become a good understanding designer if u really cannot hire the experience one. Don't make fool of ur own agency. And please do listen to others for more experience. Learn more.

I really can't take this anymore. Since 3 years working in this line, i feel pity every time i face this problem. Pity of the this cheapskate agency. And please do make our Malaysia design more be 'iktiraf' by outside. Since most of my client actually is foreign company.

Born to be religion

In Malaysia, we be born to have a religion in our certificates. Either you practice it or not, you will have a religion stated in your birth certificate or identity card.

My night class's lecturer told us a few stories, about how people starting believe in religion and why certain people don't appreciate or bother to practice the religion their born with.

We been taught since we are baby to believe in our mother born religion. This is the reason why we don't really appreciate our religion. We been taught to believe, not because we take effort to research, then believe the truth about it which lead us to practice. If we the one who found out the truth in our religions, then we will try to practice it perfectly. We'll more appreciate the religion.

I'm not a religious enough to my one religion. But deep in my heart I know that I thrust it. But for me, what ever religion u have, have religion is much better feel inside compare to don't have it at all. Because it will be a place we might throw our feel and believe at a time when we needed.